Thursday, January 05, 2006

Once again the world has survived another year, will I ?

Well......

Once again the world has survived another year and so have I, although I don't feel it, but I do wish you all a New Year of hopes and dreams....

Ah, yes those dreams something I have stopped doing a few years ago as so many of them have been shot down by both Myself and others of the world... That is not to say that good things have not come into My life over the past several years but somehow most of the dreams, wishes and hopes just haven't been there....

I am hoping that this year I can become the Dom that My littleone wants/needs and should have in her life as she is a wonderful submissive that only wishes to serve and does so even more when she is flogged, needled, whipped on a daily basis something that My health and My vanilla life won't allow Me to do sadly.... Over the past several months ( if you look back ) I have not been there enough for My littleone and that has and does bother Me a lot, but I just can't seem to get it 100% right and that is getting to her more and more and she is correct ( don't tell her that ) in her thinking.... I keep thinking is this the year I have to release her so she can have the Dom that she needs to make her life complete since she has raised two lovely daughters ( one starting to get into the lifestyle ) and made a fantastic career in her chosen field....

As I write this blog I am waiting to hear from My local hospital to tell Me when My day surgery will be scheduled for and a couple of things keep going through My head will I be able to get back a bodily function that I lost a couple of years ago and will I even leave the hospital alive ( heard a couple of deaths lately that shouldn't have happened ) or in one piece.... My logic says everything is going to be fine, but My mind/heart is thinking other things....

I am hoping that a couple of friends health improve this year so they can do the things they want to do and then enjoy life and the lifestyle the way they want to....

I keep saying that I am going to have to make some heavy decisions this year that worry Me and every year I seem to be able to not make them, but time is running out and they WILL have to be made sooner than later.....

Well am I going to survive another year, I am sure I am, but if I don't I most likely won't know about it.....

5 comments:

CLoud said...

Focus on the great things in life my friend I have already been dead twice it is not all it is cracked up to be. You have an excellent sub you have friends of which I count myself in. Take every day in stride do what you can enjoy as much of it as possible and when the day is finished discard it like a tissue that has been used and go on to the next my friend.

Dae said...

Release?
That is an option?

littleone said...

i have already sent You my private journal... talking about this "release" feature...... in it i described my "ideal" Dom.. and wow look at that .. i described You... W/we can fix what You think is broken.. W/we can mend what You think needs mending.. W/we can get through this surgery and the after effects - whatever they are - good or bad (which isn't all that bad remember that !!) W/we can face the other dilemmas together.. and face 2006 together just like W/we faced 2005 together and just like W/we will face 2007 together!! ok Sir??

morningstar (proud to be owned by Warren)

Jo aka SeaRabbit said...

This is a so sad post... and obviously, morningstar isn't into that release idea of yours... and... I'm not sure that something as a perfect Dom, or a perfct sub really exist... but in books...
Every year carried its part of good, and its part of bad... some are better than others... and you will probably ends this year with a lot of good... that's what I wish you...

Lady Baltimore said...

From morningstar's blog it sounds like she really, really loves you and is devoted to you. She makes you sound pretty awesome. Stay focused and try not to let things get to you. You're really loved and respected.